Welcome to the Dungeon

Untitled document What happens when you're a sex worker awaiting a new client, and two gay-looking guys with bibles show up to save your soul?  Mistress Matisse describes it for you:

And then as my eyes adjusted from the relative dimness of the house to the glare of the sun, I got a good look at them. Two young white men, rather slim, wearing dark slacks and long-sleeved white shirts and neckties. And gold name badges.

Holy shit, it’s a pair of Mormons!

I was standing there wearing: a very short (like, it barely covers my butt), very tight, black spaghetti-strap PVC dress that gives me tons of cleavage, a waist cincher, thigh-high shiny black high-heeled boots, my hair teased up like mad, and vampire-red lipstick. And there were these two Mormon boys, who look just barely old enough to shave, clutching their notebooks in perspiring palms, looking back at me. I must have looked like either their wet dream or their worst nightmare, depending in how devout they were.

We stared at each other in mutual confusion for an instant. And then I came to my senses and said, “Oh! Oh, no, no – go away please!” and closed the door swiftly.

It was half hilarious and half mortifying. I imagined them walking away from my house, shaking their heads and jotting down a note next to my address: Hell-bound floozy lives here. Clearly beyond any hope of salvation.

I love fucking with Mormons and other religous fanatics out to save me from hell. Oh, to have been a fly on that wall.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Welcome to the Dungeon”

  1. If only she had invited them in to preach her version of the gospel. And we were there to watch.

    That situation makes for some mad hot fantasies. Somehow the idea of being a corrupter is perhaps more arousing than it ought to be in my deviant mind.

    Oh and Remittance Girl wrote a story a while back with this theme. It’s called The Central Registry. Here’s the link http://www.remittancegirl.com/writing/shorts/central.htm

    Enjoy.

    Btw, Read all about Mickey, she’s awesome. Best to you both.

  2. Yes, Mickey is awesome. I’m always delighted when other people notice, so thanks, Tess.

    Mormonism is a very weird religion. Well, they all are, but when you get into things like sacred underwear, then you’re starting to exceed the normal religious wackiness. Let’s not forget, either, that they didn’t let black men become priests until 1978. In their favor, they’ve produced some of the perviest perverts in our perverted community. Patrick Califia, for one.

    I want to sing the praises of Remittance Girl’s story.  That’s one of the funniest and hottest things I’ve read for a while. Mistress Matisse does riff on that theme a little bit in her post, where she speculates on what she should have done.  Makes me want to go to Seattle and show up on her doorstep in Mormon garb.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s